Bad Investments and Wrong People

I had several “you’re kidding me” moments involving ”friends”. I was discussing this with my friend Jazmin (please see my post about Jaz) and she said: “You are just investing time into the wrong people. They aren’t necessarily the people who are going to be able to make you feel your best.”

That statement really helped me out.

I took it as: “STOP INVESTING YOUR TIME INTO THE WRONG PEOPLE.”

AND I KNOW THIS!!!!!

It is important to have a good support system in place because everyone doesn’t always have the best intentions for you in your endeavors.

I learned many years ago that everyone isn’t a friend and even those who are nice to you, can’t always be trusted.

I often shield myself from such toxicity and insincerity.

I realize I need to do two things:
 -Develop thicker skin

 -Recognize when I should retreat

And by retreat I don’t mean run away from a battle, I mean knowing how to pick and choose a battle, as in when do I need to just do me and when do I need to explain myself. As I am an adult I really don’t need to explain myself and if I am ok with whatever actions I take or way that I feel or decision I make I don’t have to explain because I am happy with myself.

I am very happy with who I am and what I do and the only time I question that is when others question me about it, because there is a difference of opinion.

Let me add that aside from thicker skin I need to recognize what advice or opinion I should consider and what is just fluff that I shouldn’t receive. AGAIN... People don’t always have the best intentions when giving you advice.

I am 36 years old today. My path is my path, has it been the traditional path... not exactly ... am I still GREAT... YUP! Do I have a few hardships deal with and wild ideas about how to accomplish goals...YUP!!!

DON’T GET ME WRONG... I am hoping to meet and get to know other people in the future. I know that more positive energy and good hearts are on the way into my life because that is what I ask God for and also I ask to continue to have the discernment to recognize negative energy.

Am I excited about the rest of my life... YES!! I am excited. I do big things and I don’t give myself enough credit. So let’s review....

Things to do:
-Develop thicker skin
-Pick and Choose my battles wisely
-Pick and Choose the best advice/opinion (people don’t alway have the best intentions)
-Stay on my path
-Start appreciating myself for all the great things I do
AND
-Show love to the people who I KNOW got my back
AND!!!!!
-Praise God for all the talent and strength that he gave me to make it through this LIFE.

           

                         

30 Day Challenge: Day 23-30 Finish It!!!!

Ok so I didn’t keep up with this very well at all. I slipped up and the month is almost over. I have 8 days left of the challenge.  Since it is about to be 2020 I was thinking I will just go ahead and knock the whole challenge out in one shot... here we go!!!

Day 23: Something you crave
Ice... so apparently I was/am anemic and the symptom of that was the desire to chew/eat ice regularly. I had to have ice by 9am and continued thru the day. It was really bad, but since treating the anemia that desire is almost gone. I say almost because there are times that my brain says you should get ice but its not strong enough for me to actually get the ice. BUT I love having popsicles (Banana flavored) and I prefer ice water, and very cold drinks.  I use getting sick and having a fever as my excuse to get banana pops 😂.

Day 24: Three Books on the Shelf

Ok So The Rap Year book is very informative my brother actually skimmed it and went through songs listed for each year and I sang or rapped a part of about 95% of the songs. He isn’t into rap so it was a cool bonding moment.

The Great Gatsby is probably one of my favorite stories, I think I read it at least twice and I have watched both the 1974 version and Leo and Toby version. I love both. I think its safe to say this is my all time favorite “adult” story. (Even though I read it in high school) (My favorite kid book is Witches by Roald Dahl and Hatchet by Gary Paulsen)

Ok now JUN.K the books below are called “making books”. Basically these are picture books that show how he prepared for his albums. The first one on the left is the making book for his first Japanese album “Love and Hate” in the book you will find behind the scenes pics of his photo shoots or concert practice. The middle is his making book for his 2nd Japanese album Love Letter. And the last is the making book for his album No Shadow ( which is BY FAR the SEXIEST for reasons...nipples).

Day 25: What’s in your bag?
So I don’t always carry a purse or bag but when I do more than likely you are going to find my IPad, lipstick/gloss, and my giant planner. If I have a small bag then just make up and debit/credit cards. I use to have like 100 pens/highlighters/markers/colored pencils/ but I have stopped carry those things which is dumb because I almost always need a pen.

Day 26: What do you think of your friends?
Kass and Danielle: Hot Mamas Literally

Eylul: Genius Beauty (You can do anything just do it babe)

Rachel: Kingpin the Godmotha (Big pimping working crazy remember to take it easy)

Tonya: Warrior and Ear Lover (I will never get over that fact)

Alise: Spiritual Kpop Nurse (keep going)

Megan P.: The Calm to my Hype... silent busy bee... doing stuff and not being boastful... Lowkey mom

Tony Ray: Classy Lewd Gentleman/activist (fight the power naked)

D. Coney: 1:1  My Guy (in a Denzel voice)

Jazmin: Quiet wise beyond her years... a blessing

Tao: Globetrotter Bear and by globe I mean Seattle to China  

Jess: My school girl... Masters... Doctorate!!! I will always be here to support and indulge in that Taeckay lifestyle

Please get at me if you feel like you should be on this list... but these are the people I talk to either everyday or our relationship goes back several years to 10 years back maybe more....

Day 27: Why did you want to do this challenge?
I was trying to revitalize this blog overall. I get a little disappointed because even with the amount of followers I have on instagram I am not really getting views, but I guess blogs are kind of played, but I think that the vlog business is starting to get a little saturated in other words everyone wants to be a vlogger  and don’t get me wrong if you can produce bomb content then keep going I mean I have some FAVORITES like Chris Cantada Force  PLUS I know how much production goes into vlogging, like its not just recording off your phone and uploading, I mean most are using their phones but there is editing and other concerns... I having been around videographers and Chris I see the work and money they have to put into it because they have to have equipment. They also have a niche and quite honestly my niche is me. LOL... well that and Positivity.

Day 28: this year/ last year pics and compare

 Ok we sit on the cusp of 2020 but here are December 2018 and December 2019. Difference I have a weave in 2018 (looking to do that again actually) but my real hair continues to flourish. I continue to have dark circles that can be seen EVEN with filters. I continue to love black eyeliner and the color gray. 2018 and 2019 Dani loves Jun. K I am not sure which loves him more... I have a droopy eye... 😞 FML its only gonna get worst as I age.

Day 29: What have you learned over the month?
I failed at this challenge. It is very difficult for me to keep good habits because it is easier to be lazy. So I guess I need to write up some kind of routine and work on developing better habits.

Day 30: Favorite song...
This anti climatic, like all this philosophical stuff and we end with favorite song... well I guess I can be philosophical here too LOL. First I have to figure out which artist I want to draw from. There are several artists that have made an impact on my life....
2pm: Again and again (preferably the ballad version)
Jun. K (from 2pm): Think about you
Drake: Shot for Me
Michael Jackson: Another Part of Me
Marques Houston: How You Just Gon
Mariah Carey: Lover Boy

And what is ironic or iconic or crazy about these artists, the decade that is about to end was eventful for each,  2pm debuted in 2008 but I found them at the end of 2014 and was around for 3 Korean Comebacks and 3 Japanese comebacks.
2pm gives us Jun. K and I have been there for his solo records and have waited through his 2 years of mandatory service in ROKA.
Drake “debuted” in 2009 and was already on the radar, but that fandom crept up on me suddenly I am listening to him and Jun. K back to back (you can kinda blame Jun. K, but I was with Aubrey during those Degrassi days)
Michael Jackson: died in 2009 (every time I remember this fact it happens to me all over again) but in 2014 they released some never released music and of course they tried to re-kill him and his legacy in 2019...say what you want I won’t let Michael go....
Marques Houston: Has been an artist since 1993... his last two releases were 2010’s Mattress Music and 2014’s Famous. Even though he is into producing and directing movies, I can’t let this dude go....
Mariah: the best... do I even need to say anything... people try to say she is not hitting all those notes and the truth is there are times that it is like she needed a little more tea and honey and less wine but she still ended up with 19 #1s before the decade ended... what she did was made herself the Queen of Christmas...

BUT... 
My favorite song is: ADTOY

WHY??? Its how I found 2pm/Jun. K and right now Jun. K is everything... that is just the reality of my life right now LOL!!!  This song written by the great JYP is a classic and in a sleek/classic yet modern way expresses who they are as 2pm... beastly, sexy, performers giving us fierce and manly. With rap and VOCALS... Minjun kills period....

OK the Challenge is over are you ready for the next??? LOL!

30 Days of Me: Day 7: Something That Made The Biggest Impact On Me

At first thought my mom came to mind as far as biggest impact on my life, as far as the way I was raised, but I have to say something that had a huge impact was....

The above pic is after an extended stay in the hospital in May of 2007. I was dressed to leave, but still laying in the bed that I had been in for a month. I was probably 80 lbs give or take. Later in December on the 17th it was revealed that I needed an emergency surgery called an “ileostomy” or I would died. 

The above picture isn’t me but, this is how I had to live for 3 months. Luckily my ostomy was able to be reversed. 

If you look close at this picture on the left, you can see where the stoma is on my belly. When I heard the doctor say ileostomy, I thought my life was over. When I came out of surgery he told me it would be reversed, but in those 3 months I found out how strong and amazing I could be. You have to remember in 2007-2008 I was 23-24 years old. I was fresh out of undergrad and hadn’t really figure life out, but I continued and I lived. This was definitely a turning point in my life and I realized life is too short. I had to live. It took another 2 years to really focus in and figure out what I wanted to do with my life, but I am not sure if my life would have gone this way had I never experienced getting as sick as I got. I appreciate this experience. Sometimes it takes something like this to move you out of the situation you are in and into a better situation. I have some amazing scars and I love them because they represent where I’ve been and that I lived through it. My mom says the scars are not as noticeable, but I see them and I am ok with that and embrace them.