Monday, January 21, 2013

FML...yeah it's like that today!!!!

If someone seems mad or upset them wouldn't you wonder what it wrong? If they are a friend or family member wouldn't say: Hey, what going on you seem upset? 

NO of course not. In life we general attack the ones we love the most. So when one party is being mean or seem short tempered then those closest are probably getting the brunt of it and then in return instead of trying to help those closest to them just make it worst saying things that just as hurtful. 

Its a circle that just keeps going on and on and NO one takes ownership of their actions. 

Its like I can't trust people in the street to be a true friend and care for me the way I would care for them and I can't trust family to care about my feelings so I just retreat and continue to feel alone. 

Sometimes I feel like overall people don't see me. And I have always felt that no one could see me. I really try to hard to be a good to person to love everyone, enemies, frienemies, family, friends, strangers, I try to love all...

I am very tired of loving and caring only for others to see only the negative....I can't keep doing it....I give me and I lose me... nothing is reciprocated I just get brokenhearted or torn down. 

There isn't really solution, I either retreat to myself more or I harden my heart more....

Several things I don't understand about life: 
1.) why do we need others? 
- you may think you don't but you will drive yourself crazy if you separate yourself from other humans
2.) why do we need love?
-you may think you don't especially when you've never been in love or when love hurts you but people eventually yearn for a companion who loves you and you love them

I mean they have done studies about how people are less depressed when they are in love and when they are social. So clearly we need it, but I don't know if I want it, because I am tired of being hurt. 

I never say FML but I am saying it today...

And I apologize because I always try to be positive I always try to end positively at the end but I don't know what to say, only, I continue to have faith in God, but his so-called children are making me sick!!!

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