The Other Side of the Street

As I watch divorce after divorce, between folks I know personally and the celebrities I see on TV, my belief in the concept of love is faltering like a leaf slowly turning yellow, then brown until falling from a tree in Fall. I have been holding on to a pinch of belief, thinking that just because so and so divorces doesn’t mean I am destined for the same fate. And if they aren’t divorcing they are unhappy, staying together for the children, financial reasons (it’s cheaper to keep her) or to save face as in acting like everything is honky dory in front of friends. Either way, “Love Don’t Live Here Anymore.”

I am ready to let love go because love already has one foot out the door. Not to mention past discrepancies that have left me somewhat damaged to the point that I already have doubts about their loyalties to me and it's not like I am thinking: “Oh he’ll cheat” or “I don’t trust him,” more like Saturday night he was in love and thought I was the sun, moon, and all of the rivers that flow through the valleys and Monday night it’s over. That is what is happening, people (especially celebs, but it happens in ordinary lives too) may date, then decide to get married, and 6months to a year later they divorce for irreconcilable differences. Sometimes it is so quick the marriage is annulled. It’s over Kapeesh Kaput. Ashes to ashes dust to dust…DEUCES.

So it appears that love is an EPIC FAIL. A lot of times as I walk my Mr. Cheezburger (the pup) I think about these things and I say to myself Love is over, there is no love, love is nothing and I should get over it, but it hurts me more to dismiss love, because God is love, and it is pretty hard to discontinue your belief in love, but continue your faith in God.

God is love, he made me; I am a hopeless romantic for a reason; what…He knows. Maybe it is the romantic trait in me that helps to keep Him in my heart, because without Him my heart would be hard as stone all over and all the way through, because trust me I try to forget about love, during those walks, I tell myself time and time again,

"forget about that love thing, block it out of your mind and forget about it, get use to a life with just your puppy and just deal,"

but by the time I get to the other side of the street, tears have built up in my eyes knowing that it is impossible for me to forget because I usually think of God immediately after those thoughts, especially since He surrounds me and reminds of His love. So…

…in the meantime, I’ll use my romantic spirit and the pain from so many disappointments of love to help me get through my writing project(s) to grow in the field of creative writing, leading to more published work and hopefully keep my heart open to the prospects of love.